We Aim To Slay

There comes a time in every fashionista’s life when we look at our wardrobe, and though we love the collection we have curated, we must face a harsh truth – something is missing. 

For me, I came face to face with this moment while filming an unboxing video for this Vessita maxi dress. The dress is cute, don’t get me wrong, but I knew it needed some sort of something that I didn’t own.

A Brief History of the Harness

In my opinion, that specific something was a harness. 

The harness didn’t start as a fashion accessory. It gets its roots from practical use, such as for horses and oxen and military tactical gear, before becoming a symbol of rebellion and identity. 
That turning point came, most notably, in the 1960s as the harness gained popularity in various queer subcultures. But the harness gained mainstream attention when Michael Jackson wore a gilded harness at the 1993 Super Bowl, and again in contemporary times through designers and brands such as Ann Demeulemeester, D Squared, Helmut Newton, Iris Van Herpen and Virgil Abloh’s Louis Vuitton.

The Search for the Perfect Accessory

If you’ve followed We Aim To Slay since the early days, you’ll recall that at that time I was interning at NYLON Magazine the summer before my senior year off college. I would describe my style of those days as “glam grunge” – and since turning 30, I’ve returned to that aesthetic without even realizing that a change was brewing.

Back in my college days I learned about and became obsessed with two companies – KillStar & DollsKill. I pined after their diverse inventory until early on in the pandemic, when I bought a blanket from KillStar, and from DollsKill, this dress and my beloved Steve Madden platform sandals.

According to their website, KillStar can be described as “the epitome of dark fashion,” “as distinctive as it is dark,” and “an absolute must-have for those seeking gothic glamor in every shade of black.”

Taking advantage of the 2025 holiday deals, I checked out KillStar and Immediately I saw the Wanda Harness in Black & Gold ($22.50USD on sale) and knew I had to get it! While perusing their site I stumbled across an additional piece – The Poised Opulence Belt in Gold ($47.00USD on sale) – and the rest was history!

The Unbox & Try On!

On initial try on I wore the Vessita dress with both the harness and the belt, and while I think the harness perfectly elevated the dress, I think the pattern is too conflicting with all of the chain details on the belt.

The Wanda Harness in Black & Gold

The Wanda Harness is made from faux leather, and features adjustable straps and buckle closures. It’s offered in two different “colors”, the black with gold accents, or with silver. At the moment this harness is sold out, but you can find all of their harnesses, here! 

The Poised Opulence Belt in Gold

The Poised Opulence Belt boasts three-strand chain accents (in gold) as well as a centralized chain detail. Both the chains and the cross attach to the belt via clips for easy removal and customization. Unfortunately this belt is no longer available, but they have a wide array of statement belts that can be found, here!

How I Styled Them!

I’ve now worn both pieces to work: the harness twice and the belt once to work.

We Are The Weirdos Mister

Immediately after unboxing I knew I wanted to wear the harness to work, but thought the red maxi dress would be a bit much for a Monday morning. Instead I opted for an oversized black satin dress from Zara with a pair of deep burgundy faux patent leather boots from Windsor.

Bad Girl Barbie

After my initial wearing, I thought it was time to incorporate pants into the look. Here I paired a pair of faux leather leggings with this vintage DKNY duster from Renee’s Resale. To tie all of the black accents together I added a lace bralette and these Sorel boots.

It’s Giving Buffy

Most recently I broke out the Poised Opulence belt! To really let this piece take center stage I kept my base layers simple – a black turtleneck bodysuit, sheer black tights, a maroon mini skirt from Zara, and the Windsor boots. I added the belt, and ended up taking off the cross accent.

My Thoughts!

I think it’s safe to say that I am now obsessed with wearing a harness! And through this styling process, I’ve realized that my aesthetic has really evolved into an elevated version of the grungy, quasi-Buffy the Vampire Slayer look I rocked in college.

I’ve been experimenting with and loving avant garde makeup, statement dressing, and looking cool in a vaguely unattainable way. I’m excited to keep styling these new statement pieces, and take my aesthetic to a new level and in a new direction!

What Do You Think?

I am officially convinced that a harness is a must-have accessory! And even though I’ve been a long time proponent of adding a belt to nearly every outfit, I’m excited to take that simple accessory and kick it up a notch! 

What do you think, will you be looking into avant garde accessories such as a harness? Let’s start the discussion in the comments below!

I’ll be back next week to share how I’m protecting my 3B-3C-4A curls throughout the dry and cold winter conditions of New England!

Have a great rest of your week, and remember to SLAY!